I have a bruise. On my butt. And it is very uncomfortable. Also, I believe my wrist is very slightly sprained. Feeling much better after a day in a wrist support, but still.
But on to the real matter at hand…
A few weeks ago I joined a dating website. A free one. We will refer to it as “okstupid.” The idea of online dating still kinda freaks me out, and I’m not entirely comfortable with it. Having said that, it’s been great for my ego (yes, I’m terrible, I know). For a long time, my ex was the only guy that gave me attention (romantic attention that is—your dad telling you you’re beautiful is very nice, but it’s not what I’m referring to here). I’m an introvert and I don’t get out there much. There’s no one I have particularly strong feelings about at the moment. But I’m having a good time talking to a few people.
And, no. I’m not “over” my ex yet. But I’ve accepted that we won’t be together. We had a wonderful relationship while it lasted, but that does not mean that we have a future. It might seem kind of stupid that I’m on a dating site not long after breaking up, but, fuck. I dated one person before my ex. One date. I met my ex when I was 19 going on 20 and we were on and off for a year and a half. During that time, I haven’t dated, flirted, or had any kind of romantic contact with another man. Is it so wrong for me, at 21 to want to date a little? I’m not looking for love and I’m not looking for sex. I’m just looking for someone to have a good time with while I’m here. What I have struggled with in the past is moving on. I get stuck. I’m on this site to initiate some movement in the direction I want to go.
That paragraph was a bit of a rant.)
The issue with this site is…some otherwise very nice guys have been laying it on rather thick. Like, really. It’s just too much. I read their messages and I want to burst out laughing. And I know, it’s a dating site. You sell yourself to the other person, and compliment them to get their attention or whatever, but that is no excuse for being ridiculous, right? Here’s the thing. How do I very subtly tell someone that they’re coming on too strong? They haven’t crossed any lines that makes me think I should stop talking to them, but there’s got to be a way of letting them know…
(Also, I’m aware of the dangers of online dating. I have rules: only dates in places I am familiar with; only dates during the day; I assume everyone is a liar. I’m very cautious, so there’s no need to worry. If someone seems shady, I end all contact.)